You know how sometimes you hear a saying and it just sticks with you? They always seem to always happen at just the right time. You are struggling with something and out of the blue, someone makes a statement and you think “Yes, that is exactly what I’m doing wrong.”
I have recently had this happen twice. I am currently in a holding pattern, I guess you could call it. I resigned my job in April because it was taking up way too much of my time. Since then, I have been half-heartedly searching for my next ‘gig’. I thought that I had a plan regarding coming back home, but do to busyness and information overload, I’m just sort of getting through the day…..taking care of my family’s needs, but not really accomplishing much more.
I am the type of person that thinks that you need to have it all together before you take any sort of action. You need to have all of your ducks in a row, all of the questions answered, etc. It tends to make me waste a great deal of time because I get discouraged with of my lack of progress to show for my activity, so I just move on to the next thing that I think might be my thing, never really accomplishing anything.
Take this blog, for example. I am currently going through a course to help with the business side of blogging. Obviously, the #1 main thing that you need to do if you are to have a successful blog is post regularly. Of which, I do not. I am always thinking that I need to be able to make the perfect graphics, have the perfect message, figure out the back end of the blog, etc. I have post ideas, but I don’t write them down, so I forget them. None of this is getting me closer to where I want to be……..because I know I have so much more to learn, I just leave it at that and nothing gets done.
So many areas of my life are this way. It’s the same for getting healthy. I was in a really good place with working out regularly and I hurt my back really bad again. I was eating good, but then my crazy softball life got in the way and I’m back to not-so-good choices. My back is on the mend, but I haven’t started working out again because I don’t want to walk (thought it’s the best thing for my back), I want to kickbox. I don’t want to just go buy fruits and veggies because I have intentions so finish my meal plan and then I’ll have to go to the store anyway, so I just munch on whatever junk is already in the house.
Now that you have the background so you know why these sayings are so important to me, here are the 2 sayings that are speaking to me right now.
The 1st one is from Anna Duggar regarding her situation with husband, Josh. In one of the interviews for the show, she stated that her motto for dealing with Josh’s infidelity was, “Just say the next right thing.” Things may fall apart, she may not be feeling like she wants to be pleasant, but regardless she committed that the next words out of her mouth would be “the right thing”. She wasn’t acting on her emotions, her fears of the future, or her hurt. She was committed to honoring God and her marriage by speaking words that she didn’t necessarily feel because she knew that it was the right thing to do.
I want to apply this principle to my life. I want this to be my attitude when I don’t feel like doing something.
When I don’t want to work out, Just do the next right thing.
When I want processed junk food, Just make the next right food choice.
When my husband or children are frustrating me, Just say the next right thing.
Our lives are made up of “the next things”. All of those commitments to make the very next ONE thing right end up being compounded until they are part of us. All of the life changes that we (I) desire are made up of one good decision after the next, after the next, after the next………………
Change is so difficult, but breaking it down to the very next decision and then the very next decision makes huge changes not seem so scary and unattainable.
The next saying that hit me where it counts was from Carrie Wilkerson. She shared this graphic on Facebook yesterday and it totally described me and what I do.
I always wait for things to be perfect before I do ANYTHING. It paralyzes me. What if someone asks me something about my adventure and I don’t know the answer??? What if I do something wrong and have to start over??? What if, What if, What if……………..
Have you ever notices how much stuff is out there proclaiming that the person struggled to find out how to do this or that, so they wrote the course or whatever to save you the struggle? I have fallen prey to so many of these tactics. Why do I want to put in the time when someone else has it all figured out?
BUT WHAT IF THE SUCCESS IS IN THE STRUGGLE?
WHAT IF YOUR PURPOSE OR MISSION IS FOUND IN THE MESS OF WORKING THROUGH FAILURES?
At the end of the day, their journey is different than mine. Yes, there are some technical things that I can learn. There are some short cuts that will help me save time. There are some foods that may be better for my body than what I’m eating. There are some workouts that my body will react to better than others.
All this stuff is great, and I think that you should never quit learning, but we (I) need to stop waiting to be perfect before we ever start! No one can solve all of your problems. No progress will come without putting in the work; whether it be in your parenting life, your marriage, your health, your finances, or your life purpose. I’ve also heard that nothing worth having comes easy.
Are you tired of being stuck where you are because your insecurities keep you frozen? Are you so worried about messing up or failing that you don’t move at all? Are past failures creeping in and making you feel that no matter what, you won’t reach your goals?
Do these two simple things:
- Commit that your very next decision will be the right one, then do it again and again and again (and if you mess up, because you will, offer yourself grace and make your very next decision the right one)
- Take what you already know, and START! Make mistakes, learn from your mistakes, and create YOUR OWN path…..but keep going! Don’t stop because you don’t know what to do next. Just take ONE more action. Take ONE step in the right direction, then take another, then another, then another……………
Do you struggle with getting frozen by fear of what if’s (tell me I’m not the only one!!)? What are some of the ways that you get over yourself to move on toward your goals?