So we are one week into the new year.
New goals, new checklists, new commitments.
Did you already fail your resolutions? Did you already fall back into old patterns? Are you already thinking that you are a quitter, that you never follow through, that you will never succeed or reach the goals you so desperately want to reach?
That was me too.
I am the ultimate quitter. I am all excited and pumped for new ventures, new opportunities, new plans but when the newness wears off, I quit. I have many reasons why I quit, but they really just all boil down to excuses. Sometimes they are valid
reasons excuses, but they still let me off the hook. Then I look back later and wonder why I continue to do this. Why do I keep quitting?
What I’ve started to discover is that I label myself…… a LOT.
And they aren’t nice labels. They go something like this……non-athlete, not as smart as I once was, impatient, too much yet not enough, junk food lover, lazy, not a morning person, irrational, the list goes on and on………………
As I let this negative self talk continue and let these feelings dictate my actions, I find myself quitting yet again.
I QUIT BECAUSE I AM LETTING MY EMOTIONS DRIVE MY ACTIONS.
I AM ALLOWING LIES TO DICTATE MY EMOTIONS WHICH IN TURN DRIVE ME TO QUIT…..BECAUSE IN MY MIND I WILL NEVER ACCOMPLISH THE GOAL ANYWAY.
THEN I DON’T HAVE TO DEAL WITH FAILURE BECAUSE I WON’T OPEN MYSELF UP TO IT. I’LL JUST QUIT FIRST.
“I can’t do this”
“I don’t know how to do this”
“I’m not strong enough”
“What will people think?”
“What if I fail publicly?”
“What if I embarrass my family”
“What if my personality is too much/too timid for them?”
As I am becoming aware of how much I label myself, I am learning how to correct it. I am learning that I am holding myself back from accomplishing my goals because of lies that I am believing.
WHY can’t I be healthy?
WHY can’t I write a book?
WHY can’t I coach others on a healthy lifestyle?
WHY can’t I run an online business?
WHY can’t I lose weight and feel better than in my 20’s?
WHY can’t I help others find their God given purpose and design?
The short answer?? I CAN (and so can you!)
I can do all of these things. I can blow off any discouragement from those that don’t understand my journey. I can workout and eat healthy and lose the weight (for good). I can run an online community that encourages women to be healthy and whole and live out their purposes. I can change the trajectory of my life by changing what labels I allow to define me.
One of the things in my life that I actually followed through on was a workout schedule with my brother a few years ago. We made a pact that for 1 year, we would work out for at least 1/2 hour 5 days a week. If we made it, we would take a weekend couples trip with our spouses to celebrate our commitment.
We started checking in every day with each other so that we were held accountable. The every day check ins faded to every few days or so as time went on; however, it was still motivational because we each knew that the other would be checking in. For someone that is competitive, the thought of having to tell him that I broke our deal was not.going.to.happen. It kept me on track. It took my emotions out of the equation.
I ended up working out 5 days a week for 1 whole year. Not once during that time did I call myself a quitter. I didn’t label myself as non-athletic. I never thought that it was too hard. I just knew that I was accountable to him and that I had to stay the course. We ended up knowing about 1/2 way through that we weren’t going to be able to do the trip, but it didn’t deter me. At that point, just having to check in was enough.
Is that what you are lacking? Accountability? Do you consider yourself not a “people person” so you try to do everything yourself? That was me. The more I kept to myself, the more I fell into the lies and labels. The more I let myself come up with excuses fueled by the labels. The more I quit.
I’ve never been big on a word of the year…..however, I saw the word DILIGENT on a friend’s Facebook post in December and it hit me hard. It just wouldn’t go away. I knew that I was being called to diligence in 2018 (and beyond).
I have also learned that to be diligent, I am going to NEED to have accountability. Accountability to do what I say I am going to do, to develop new habits that support my goals, to stay the course. I have always thought that I was a self driven person…..but I’ve learned that I am driven by others. I must have the tough love of someone in my back pocket asking if I’m letting labels push me. To some point, I can push myself….but having to check in with others lights a fire in my like nothing else.
Do you have new goals for 2018 (or goals that you set year after year after year)? Do you feel that you need accountability to succeed?
I’ve had the idea that I should start a private group on Facebook just for accountability. No cost, no strings attached, no pressure. Just a place where we can encourage each other, check in, have community, be real, be vulnerable when it gets hard, and pray for each other.
I know that there are many groups out there……but I want this to be a place where you can participate as much or as little as you want. Share goals, share labels that are rearing their ugly heads, share victories, share hardships.
Would you be interested in that? Leave me a comment, message me, or contact me here to be added.
What are your goals for 2018? Are you going to let labels and emotions hold you back? What if you are in the same place this time next year? Will you wish you’d have followed through? Let me help……..join me in this journey to kick quitting to the curb!
Please like and share using the buttons below!!!